Essay, Research Paper: Emotions

Psychology

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No matter how hard you try, you cannot control your emotions, only attempt to
hide them. Emotions influence every aspect of our lives, what we do, what we
say, and et cetera. All of our emotions, from anger to insecurity, are
influenced by several factors, just as our lives are influenced by our emotions
(Gelinas, Emotions 35). First of all, it causes problems when one does not trust
himself, and it shows up in many ways. Some people brag to call attention to
themselves, causing others to believe that the egoistic person has a lot of
self-respect. Very often though, egotism can be an attempt to cover up
insecurity in a person who does not feel they will be good enough without it (Gelinas,
Emotions 36). Bragging about one’s achievements, material possessions, or
achievements reveals a sense of inferiority. Even though one may brag their
whole lives, they never reach a sense of well being. This is caused by fixation,
which is when a person does not grow emotionally after a certain point (Gelinas,
Emotions 64). A person that brags a great deal may also be considered a snob. A
snob may not act as a braggart for the same reasons egoistic people do, for what
snobs do is act so that they end up isolating themselves. They do this to avoid
the trouble of friends, responsibilities, and emotional relationships by giving
a snobbish attitude to the people who put up with these things (Gelinas,
Emotions 45). Another sign of insecurity is envy. One often envies another to
hide a lack of trust in themselves. They envy others accomplishments because
they don’t think they themselves can achieve those accomplishments (Milios
39). Many factors influence anger. Most anger is caused by a situation that
makes one feel uncomfortable (Licata 14). This uncomfortable feeling could also
be described as feeling threatened. Feeling threatened could lead to angry
feelings because a threat can cause harm. Things that could make one feel
threatened include disapproval, betrayal, deprivation, exploitation,
manipulation, frustration, violence, and humiliation (Gaylin 95). One has their
own ways of handling anger, most of which are unhealthy. Denial is one way of
handling anger by using self-deception. In denial, one does not allow themselves
to register a feeling that is threatening in one way or another (Gaylin 96).
Bigotry is another way of handling anger. “A person that is prone to anger
must create an object to be angry at. Therefore, the object of the anger is not
the cause of the bigot’s pain, but the solution” (Gaylin 114). Anger can
sometimes turn into hate. Some different terms for hate could be annoyance,
irritation, hostility, or maliciousness. Some of the “symptoms” of hate
include wanting to hurt, humiliate, damage, destroy, threaten, and wanting to
seek revenge on someone. Some people try to justify their actions by having the
motive of wanting to destroy to rebuild on a stronger foundation (Gelinas, Anger
12). There are five distinguishable kinds of hate: incipient, inward, explosive,
deflected, and constructed. Incipient hate is a dislike that causes one to take
action against the frustration that caused it. Inward hate is also caused by
frustration, but is kept inside because of the fear of punishment from the world
if they are to express their anger. Explosive hate usually bursts forth with out
warning. This kind of hate could be a product of holding in too much inward
hate. Deflected hate is when one imagines one object as another so they can
express their hate without hurting the original object. Constructive hate is a
positive hate. This is when one feels so strongly about something, it causes
them to direct their hate at fighting the injustices (Gelinas, Anger 14). There
are three ways to deal with difficult situations. One can face their problems,
one can change them for the better, or one can try to escape from them.
Daydreaming can be an escape from reality because the person creates a different
world; therefore, frequent daydreaming encourages turning away from reality (Gelinas,
Emotions 42). Religion can also be used as an escape from problems. Even if they
don’t mean to, a person can blame God for the problems in their life, rather
than doing something for them (Gelinas, Emotions 47). Running away is often used
as an escape from one’s responsibilities, but more often an escape from
one’s troubles. Marriage, when used as an escape from bad circumstances,
generally leads to even more unhappiness. Anyone who can provide for the
desperate person would be accepted. However, the desperate person usually ends
up hating the provider because they feel they are trapped (Gelinas, Emotions
46). Some people try to deceive reality by not taking anything seriously. They
feel they are too good to feel sad, so they constantly act happy to avoid have
emotional responsibilities such as relationships (Gelinas 45). In conclusion,
many things can influence our emotions. Emotional problems can be revealed in
the way one acts, even though acting a certain way is often used to camouflage a
problem.
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